08 February 2008

Don't Panic

"Don't Panic."

This rule comes in handy for one of my favorite things: teaching middle school students to think. Don't we all tend to overreact at any imminent threat? I panic if I've forgotten to make dinner, forgotten to buy milk, overslept, or if I've spilled bleach on a washer-full of darks--and I'm an adult! Those poor middle school kids panic over much more trivial events than that, and their panics are much more dramatic and emotional.

What I need to remember, and what I want to teach the kiddoes, is "Don't Panic." Panic short-circuits the solution-oriented part of grown-up thinking and rockets you into hysteria, despair, and foolishness.


Now for the backstory:
My mom is a high school secretary at a Christian school (the school, by the way, that my sister and I both attended from preschool-12th grade). Somehow or other, Mom and her office-mate at the time got a flyer from a student entitled "What to Do if You're Left Behind after the Rapture."

Let me digress about that flyer and the doctrinal morass I'm about to jump into:
*Most Reformed Calvinistic Presbyterians tend not to believe in the Secret Rapture--what the feature film Left Behind teaches. Even if they do--and there are some who do--they don't teach that the people who didn't make it will have extra chances to make the cut (so to speak).
*So, in my little Presbyterian world (which is heavy on the 'instruction of proper doctrine'), this flyer was funny because it made at least two doctrinal leaps: (1) that there is such a thing as the Secret Rapture and (2) even if there is a Secret Rapture, that the 'stragglers' will have another chance, and another, and another...
*I was in junior high school, the age when students are really getting it about underlying rules and regulations AND the compliance thereto. (I was learning proper doctrine and thought that I knew everything...and that I was free to laugh at those who didn't agree with me. Sheesh.)
*The flyer in question was also poorly punctuated, and badly spelled, and used nonstandard grammar. (Those three written-English transgressions have always caught my attention and set my teeth on edge.)

...so, when I was in junior high school, Mom and her office-mate were giggling over this flyer. The funniest part was the first suggestion (because it was so very, very understated): "Don't Panic."

It was funny, because if I were left behind and planes were crashing and cars were wrecking and we had a terrible cataclysmic apocalyptic event, the first thing I would be doing would be, of course, PANICKING.

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That was backstory. Remember the rule: Don't Panic. It's good for all of us to learn, and for all of us to remind others.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Krista said...

Wow. I really, really don't get your poem.

And I just went and read the links you list...I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to cut your comment.

Because families and people with children read this blog.

Anonymous said...

I agree that my material if for adults.

“because, if you confess with your mouth that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes and is justified, and with the mouth one confesses and is saved.” (Romans 10:9-10)  listen to chapter  (Read by Max McLean. Provided by The Listener's Audio Bible.)

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