09 June 2012

When I lose my temper, something breaks

A few years ago, I was angry and slammed a door. The window in the door was not sealed properly, so the slamming of the door caused the window to shatter explosively. Thank God my husband wasn't in the room!

I cried as I cleaned the glass shards from the floor and shelves. What a failure the evening was! How thankful I was for sparing me from hurting anyone! How I hate and abhor my temper!

I asked God to remind me that things shatter when I lose my temper. He does. But I jus lost my temper again and I broke something.

Son J1 is fighting naps, for whatever reason. I set him down for a nap and up he popped, and chattered and talked and yelled for attention--and I got mad.

I stormed into his room, told him sternly that he was to lie down and go to sleep--and as I walked in I saw his face go from 'happy to see you, Mama!' to 'Im being bad, but how?' in the space of a heartbeat.

Instead of breaking a window, I hurt my own son. Sigh. Perhaps he was being rebellious and needed a little heartbreak to teach him that disobedience is painful--but I don't know.

I do know that 'man's anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires' and that no good comes from my temper tantrums.

And he's still not sleeping. I could just cry with frustration and vexation.

2 comments:

Christina Gualazzi said...

I don't know you, but I found these two communities on Facebook that might help... http://www.facebook.com/Consciousparentingnow and http://www.facebook.com/peacefulparenting

Sometimes we need constant reminders not to fall back into unhealthful behaviors. When I catch my body tensing up, I breathe and repeat 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 and am mindful of what that verse is saying. Hope this helps.

Christina Gualazzi said...

I don't know you, but I found these two communities on Facebook that might help... http://www.facebook.com/Consciousparentingnow and http://www.facebook.com/peacefulparenting

Sometimes we need constant reminders not to fall back into unhealthful behaviors. When I catch my body tensing up, I breathe and repeat 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 and am mindful of what that verse is saying. Hope this helps.